Location: Bucerias, Mexico

At my last doctor’s appointment she noticed I had gained four pounds… in the past three weeks. So as I was leaving she said, “Oh and no more carbs.”

And then I died.

So I’m eating salads with steamed chicken breast and smoothies with low fat milk for the rest of the pregnancy because after you remove salt, fat, and carbs, you’re pretty much out of options. Sometimes I look longingly at the asado stands as we drive by, the bundles of green onions caramelizing in the charcoal BBQ pit, the meat casting large plumes of fragrant smoke upward, customers using their fingers to push tortillas filled with spicy salsas and charred meat into their mouths. I hate those people.

After my doctor laid that on me and we started to head out, she hugged me and air kissed me on each cheek. Just like she did when I arrived. Oh, really, your OB GYN doesn’t hug and kiss you when you arrive and leave? Well, maybe you’re not in Mexico. I’m just saying.

By the way I know this photo is approaching a glam shot of the ol’ belly bump, it just needs a hazy blur and a watermark on it that says, “Little Angels Photography Studio” across the bottom. I promise we’ll stop short of staging a shot of Drew kissing my belly or doing the “heart hands” which I TOTALLY DID LAST TIME, don’t judge, but seriously if I photoshop the ultrasound 3D pic of the baby onto my belly, you have permission to just TAKE THIS SITE DOWN.