Have you ever found yourself in a place or predicament of sorts and wondered…”Self!  What in the Wide-wide World of Sports is a-goin’ on with your good senses?!”  Well, I have.  On countless occasions.

But his particular occasion was on the Rockcastle River.  Set deep in the lush, humid, Kudzu infested hills of, Rockcastle County, Kentucky.  One of those places so beautiful and peaceful, a fella could stay there for days and days and days.  Until the Banjo music starts playing too close for comfort, that is.  When that happens, one must take to the River.  And even then……all bets are off.

The phone rang very early in the a.m., and my friend Towley said “You ready for this?”.  To which I responded, in my best John Wayne voice, “Let’s saddle up, Pilgrim.”  And off we went.  South.  The wind whistling over the boats anchored, hopefully securely, to the tops of the automobiles and no Idea what was in store for us.

The Rockcastle River is a Kentucky State protected river

A false sense of Calm

so access to a put in is few and far between.  My copy of “A Canoe and Kayaking Guide to Kentucky“, says that if one so desires, to shorten the trip, one has access via “the old Howard Place”.  This put-in allows quick access to the class III, VI, and sometimes V rapids that we had no business being on.  We wanted no part of that though.  We wanted the Long, 20 mile trip.  What fools we were.  It would have been better to take our beatings early and be gone.  Like ripping off a Band-Aid.  But no.  We had to paddle, after putting in at the Rockcastle Adventure Canoe Livery, the eight miles of slack, sometimes (but very seldom) Class I chutes.  Fools, I tell you brothers and sister.  Fools.

I have to take pause here to mention the fine People at

No banjo music at all, oddly enough

Rockcastle Adventure Canoe Livery.  Nice folks.  And informative.  John, the owner, took us in the “shed” and gave us a look via an old USGS map, of what we had to look forward to.  John grinned as we took in the Canoe outside that had been twisted around a tree down stream where we would find ourselves in a few short hours.  “We found that’un there just last week,” he remarked.  Awesome.

We said our goodbyes to John, donned our helmets (you will need helmets.  steak tastes so much better when you don’t have to pulse it in a Blender first) dressed in our PFDs (this equipment, too, is a must.  unless you can hold your breath a very, very long time) and shot out into the calm, olive waters.

The rest, well, was just Highballs with the Devil.

This is the part when you get Wet

Note: This river is foul tempered, friends and neighbors.  Do not make the mistake of being ill-prepared here.  Please, please, pretty-please wear a helmet and a proper PFD (personal flotation device).  After the first “wet exit”, you’ll thank me. Also, there are many blind turns along the way.  Scouting is advisable.  And portaging is always acceptable.

All photos by Charles A. Downs III

I just spent a 3 day weekend in Lexington, Kentucky.

The locals were fantastic.  The service at my hotel was phenomenal.  My traveling companions were wonderful to hang out with.

And I could not wait to get out of Lexington.

I absolutely love experiencing new places.  Before I leave, I always do a quick google search for “things to do in INSERT CITY NAME HERE” to get an idea of the must see attractions in the area that will give me a sense of the local culture.  When I arrive, I immediately ask the hotel concierge what tourist (and not so touristy) attractions they recommend.

All of my attempts to discover “things to do in Lexington” lead me to the same response.

Bourbon and Horses.

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When the Hostas finally, after a long and cold Winter, start pushing the warming earth, that’s when I usually come out of the cave.  It’s like my very own Bat Signal.  Only it’s not trouble that calls the Great Bear out of his hibernation.

It’s water.

Kentucky, as is it written in A Canoeing & Kayaking Guide to Kentucky, can boast more moving water than any other state in the Nation.  Save for Alaska.  Now, I can’t, with accuracy, say that the afore mentioned statistic is true or not.  And to be quite honest, I’m far too lazy to do the research.  Maybe lazy is not the right word. Hmmmmmm.  Motivation.  That’s it.  I lack motivation for the research of such statistics.

At any rate, after loading the Necky kayak and fully caffinating myself, I pointed my Volvo west.  Destination?  Frankfort, Kentucky and the Elkhorn Creek.

At the put in.

What’s that you say?  You don’t have your own boat or even gear?  No worries.  My friends at Canoe Kentucky have everything you need.  Canoes, Kayaks, PFD (personal flotation device – otherwise known as Life Vests) and paddles.  Those fine gentlemen, for a modest fee, will even pick you up and schlep you back to your car.  If you are uneasy about the water all together, a guided trip can be arranged.

From towering Palisades, to rolling farmland, from class II – III whitewater to fine Smallmouth bass and bluegill fishing in deep, cool pools, Elkhorn Creek has it all.  The creek will meander about some of the prettiest country around and if you’re lucky, you’ll fall out and go for an unexpected swim.  Who doesn’t like surprises?  That being said, it’s best to leave you’re cell phones and other “damaged by water” items in your car.  No need for GPS.  The creek will take you where you need to go.

Merrily Down the Stream

Like camping?  Try the Elkhorn Campground. If that isn’t your cuppa, there are a number of fine Hotel/Motel establishment just a few miles west.  I’ll just say, the Elkhorn Campground is smack on the edge of the Elkhorn Creek and having a river/creek sing you to sleep is just about better than anything.  Save for free beer and money.

I’d like to tell you that there is a cute little Mom and Pop in the immediate vicinity that serves Kobe beef and cold beer in 50 gallon buckets, but much like my date with the very pretty French princess from Braveheart, it’s a dream.  But fear not, Downtown Frankfort has a variety of eateries that are sure to please.

So what are you waiting for?  It’s getting warm.  Why not take an un-chlorinated swim?

It’s better for your hair.

All photos by C.A. Downs III

Abraham Lincoln

“Hey, guys.  We have a choice…” I called to the rowdy and quite restless bunch of kids destroying the back of my van.  It had been a long ride and I was looking for something, anything, to give us all a break.

“What is it, Dad?” they almost collectively shouted.  If nothing else, I at least now had their attention.

“We can go to see the log cabin where Abraham Lincoln was born.”

“Or, what?”

“What do you mean or what?!  Abraham Lincoln.  The 15th* president of the United States.”

Nothing.

“Abraham Lincoln–you know, the guy on the quarter!*  Lincoln Logs.”

T-Rex

“Come on, Dad.  What else?  What’s the other choice?”

“Or…we can drive a few miles further and stop at Dinosaur World.”

The van erupted, “DINOSAUR WORLD, DINOSAUR WORLD!!!”

And so it was decided.  Apparently, strolling through the woods in search of life sized replicas of all things saurus has more immediate appeal than Abe’s Log Cabin, at least to a group of wily kids road weary and full of pent-up energy.  “Sorry Abe.”

Dinosaur World is located on Interstate 65 in Kentucky almost equidistant between Louisville, KY and Nashville, TN.  Unless you’re blind, and if you are you shouldn’t be driving, you can’t miss it.  It’s right off of Exit 53 at Cave City, KY.  You can even see some of the dinosaurs from the interstate.

An Unknown Saurus

The park is laid out in a wooded, slightly hilly (but not taxing) area where you can leisurely stroll (or run screaming like banshees as my children chose to do) the paved path and observe the over 100 life sized dinosaur replicas in what you can only imagine would be a setting similar to when they roamed the area back in the 1800′s**.

Banshees at Dinosaur World

Each dinosaur is accompanied by a very nicely written marker that gives the dinosaur’s name and a few interesting facts about it without being condescending or overtly preachy.  The markers even phonetically spell out the name of the dinosaur to assist the dino-illiterate (me) with pronunciation.  My son loved being able to read the names and call them out to me.

Zane Reading the Marker

There is a Fossil Dig area where the kids could dig for their very own dinosaur fossils (which they could keep), a play area, a movie cave, a dinosaur dig and of course, a gift shop.  Walking the dinosaurs is not permitted, but if Fido travels with you and has a leash he’s more than welcome at Dinosaur World.

Triceratops Sculpture

There are no food services inside of the Dinosaur World Park so plan accordingly.  Picnics are encouraged.  There are plenty of eating establishments in Cave City including Cracker Barrel which is kind of like crack to my kids.  It’s the Stuckey’s of the new millenia.

As a bonus, Dinosaur World’s admission fees won’t break your travel budget.  ($12.75 for adults, $9.75 for children 3-12)  While our visit to Dinosaur World was merely a pit-stop to refuel and release some pent up energy, there are several other area attractions and numerous places to stay in and around Cave City, KY should you decide a longer visit is in order.

I also have to believe that the wild running and nonstop screaming may be better suited to Dinosaur World than the Lincoln Birthplace.  But that’s just my hunch.

Spikey

*  Abe was actually the 16th president of the United States and his face can be found on the penny as well as the five dollar bill.

** All dates are approximate.

(All Photos by Ed Lamaze)