Let’s face it, there are those people you hear about who just have really bad luck. They have true experiences of ‘travel nightmares’ but those aren’t what I’m talking about. This week it’s 13 recurring nightmares that I have about travel every time I’m on the road.

# 1. Getting lost, horribly lost.

I mean, can’t tell North from South kind of lost. In the nightmare I wander aimlessly (usually in London) looking for something and just getting more and more lost. I can’t tell you how excited I am about GPS…

#2. Finding out my ‘cool’ foreign-language shirt says something embarrassing.

I especially have this fear about a French shirt I have, which I’ve insisted on having translated several times. I’m pretty sure it says “love” but I dream I get to Paris one of these days and it will end up being some variation on ‘love’ that means something *cough* more.

#3. The one worse than #2 : Arriving without any clothes on.

A recurring theme on the old High School nightmare perhaps. I have this nightmare where I show up at the airport without any clothes on. Being me, I act as if I’m wearing the emperor’s new clothes and proceed to check in to my flight. Only bonus? TSA screening is much less complicated, even if it is a bit more uncomfortable for TSA. I, of course, have a new suit on that they simply can’t see so I’m fine.

#4. Getting sick in Mexico.

This is a very specific dream, based on a childhood experience that was rather traumatizing at a Rosarito doctor’s office when my sister was sick. The inability to relay your illness in a foreign language sparks this dream every time I travel to a foreign country where I don’t speak the language. Including, of all places, when we went to Quebec, Canada!

#5. Getting left behind.

This nightmare is perhaps the reason I don’t take cruises or travel with tours. I dream that I’m in some place without a map, transportation or language and I get left behind by the tour I’m with. Without anyway to contact them, I must learn to live off the land… Ok, perhaps too many episodes of LOST.

#6. Speaking of which, I don’t have a fear of flying but I do have a recurring dream of being in a plane crash.

This is due entirely to the first season of LOST where they showed that vivid plane crash sequence so many times that I developed PTSD from it.

#7. Being purse-snatched and ending up without any money.

It’s never happened because I’ve invested in, perhaps, every single ‘hide your money on your person’ invention that has ever come along. Never the less, I still dream that it happens regularly. It happened to Dave from gobackpacking.com and his tale on that blog about the experience allayed some of my fears, but I’m still taking my belt pouch with me wherever I go.

#8. Having a traveling companion die while in a foreign country.

As if having someone you love enough to travel with pass away unexpectedly isn’t bad enough, add to that trying to figure out how to get them home. I mean, that sort of thing just doesn’t fit in a carry-on…

#9. Throwing up on the Queen (or really, any head of state).

In this dream, I’m granted an audience with a head of state, usually the Queen of England or the President of the United States. I get to her, and as I’m about to kneel, I projectile vomit all over her white ermine (or his $3,000 suit).

#10. Being chased by a camel.

Through the pyramids and streets of Geza. And I can’t get away. Like something from Indiana Jones, but with a camel instead of bad guys with guns. Really, I think I need to get some better movie selections.

#11(points for figuring out the classic movie reference) I’m traveling between towns in Europe and every town I come to seems to be over run with the plague.

And everything is in black and white…

#12. Getting to a foreign country to discover, much to my amazement, that I’m an international idol there.

I get off the plane to screaming fans and am chased through the streets in my car. Now this is a nightmare to me because I have ABSOLUTELY NO MUSICAL TALENT and they expect me to put on a concert. Ok, that’s it… no more Rock Band video game for me…

#13. Ending up in the middle of a war zone.

Mind you, I’m planning a trip this winter to see my friends while they’re stationed in Kuwait for a book I’m working on, but that’s a planned trip to a war zone.  And my friends each have their own armories.  In the dream, I’m in some neutral place like Switzerland or Canada or Australia and suddenly war breaks out and I’m in the middle of a war zone unexpectedly. And usually I’m without any writing insturiments, which is the worst part.

So what are your (hopefully unfounded) travel nightmares?

** Thanks to Hsin Ho for the particularly scarry nightmare photo!

From guest blogger Marsha Takeda-Morrison of Sweatpantsmom

Just because it’s a sweltering night in L.A. doesn’t mean you have to lock yourself in your air-conditioned house downing pints of Ben and Jerry’s. Sure it’s fun, but sooner or later that freezer of yours will be empty and you’ll have to run out for more ice cream anyways, so why not make a night of it? Here are some ways to enjoy the nightlife in L.A. – don’t stay out too late and you can still stop at 7-Eleven on the way home for another pint of Cherry Garcia.

A movie at a cemetery may not be your idea of a fun (and even romantic) evening but lots of people think this event is anything but dead. Join the crowds at the Cinespia outdoor movie screenings at Hollywood Forever Cemetery where you can enjoy old classics and new hits like “The Thin Man” and “27 Dresses” alongside the final resting places of stars such as Rudolph Valentino and Charlie Chaplin. Bring along a meal, a bottle of wine and party with the festive crowd amongst the crypts. Don’t forget to bring some dessert to share with the ghost of William Randolph Hearst, who is said to frequently visit the crypt of his mistress, Marion Davies.

I can only describe Summer Sessions at the Getty as a sort of highbrow wave. The well-heeled denizens of the art world come together with the pulsating bodies of twenty-somethings looking for a good free outdoor event with strong booze. But it sure is fun! Come dance to high-energy electronica and world music spun by first-rate DJs in the Getty Center courtyard, and then cool off with a drink at one of their outdoor bars. The strangest thing I saw the last time I was there was an elderly museum employee tearing up the dance floor to a techno remix of “I Will Survive.” Really!

Technically not in Los Angeles, but only a short 90-minute drive for the adventurous. The W Hotel in San Diego has a great rooftop bar called the Sand Bar that features a heated sand floor (yes, real sand to get inside your shoes), fire pits, private cabanas and nightly movie screenings. The best part? Unlike a real beach, there’s no sunscreen required, and a waiter delivers your drink on a tray instead of you having to fish it out of your own ice chest.

For a rooftop bar closer to home, there’s the Roof Bar at the Standard Downtown. Order a mai-tai and then lay down on one the vibrating space-pod waterbeds (you may have to wait a while for your turn.) This place is teeming with hipsters, so make sure you have your best Prada bag (or excellent knock-off) slung over your shoulder that night. There’s a live DJ on Sunday afternoons, but the cover is a steep $20 – I guess with a name like Roof Bar you’d have to expect the prices to be sky-high.

Photo: StandardHotels.com

The French may not value Liberty as much as they used to do, but they sure do know how to celebrate it. Especially when they’re in New York. If you’re a night owl looking for things to do in New York, the Bastille Day celebrations in New York City extend into the wee hours of Monday, July 14th, with lots of hard partying, street festivities, games and getting collectively drunk enough that a lay visitor might be forgiven for assuming the Francophiles to be in the throes of a revolution trying to liberate NYC from Mayor Bloomberg’s iron grip.

From Saturday afternoon through Sunday night, there’s events lined up starting with the French Institute sponsored food street spectacle on 60th Street which stretches from 5th Ave to Lexington, the pétanque competitions at the Bar Tabac and the music shows, and then its time for the grand annual Bastille Day Ball at Spotlight Live on Monday evening, with dancing from 8 pm to 2 am.

Then there’s the Liberty Festival at Le Halles, which goes one step further. They started the party on July 4th, and are continuing it on upto July 14th, in an attempt to keep away the post Independence Day holiday blues, and keep the party alive for a whopping ten days from July 4-14.

But this is New York, and it inevitably gets progressively weirder. And if it involves the French, well.. even better. There’s a special Bastille Day party at the Lolita Bar in the Lower East Side from 6 to 9 pm July 14th, hosted by travel writer Tony Perrottet in honor of Napoleon’s Baguette, where he will unveil a replica of Napoleon’s disembodied penis. Any questions? Well, thing is, Perrottet just came out with a book titled Napoleon’s Privates: 2500 Years of History Unzipped, in which he addresses issues such as how Napolean’s organ ended up in New Jersey.

Photo credit – Le Comité des Associations Françaises (cafusa.org)

If you have been feeling the urge to get out with your girlfriends and leave the husband/boyfriend/cat at home…then I have a great suggestion for you!

Never has there been a better “ladies’ night” excuse than the release of Sex and the City–The Movie. Women across the world are giddy with delight that it is finally here–four years after the last episode aired!

If you live in the Bay Area, then I have the perfect location for this most exciting girls getaway. Gather your gaggle of gals and buy tickets to see the movie in San Francisco at Sundance Kabuki Theater on Fillmore. This is an excellent movie theater in a beautiful building. But, more importantly, there is one theater with balcony seating next to a full service bar. So, you can sit back in their large comfy seats and drink a Cosmo while you watch Carrie and the girls in New York City.

I went this week and it was a blast! Go out to dinner first and dress up….channel your inner Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte, or Miranda fashion sense. Get to the movie early though! On a Tuesday night the line at the bar was out the door, filled with enthusiastic women–no men to be seen.

I won’t spoil the movie for anyone–but, it is definitely worth seeing. So, organize your group of friends and go see it in style!

Thanks to Shereen for the great pic!

Who was your favorite character on SATC?